{"id":1015,"date":"2016-03-15T15:17:06","date_gmt":"2016-03-15T23:17:06","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.checkworks.com\/blog\/?p=1015"},"modified":"2019-06-18T10:09:46","modified_gmt":"2019-06-18T18:09:46","slug":"5-tips-for-dealing-with-extra-annoying-co-workers","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blog.checkworks.com\/index.php\/5-tips-for-dealing-with-extra-annoying-co-workers\/","title":{"rendered":"5 Tips for Dealing With Extra-Annoying Co-Workers"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.checkworks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/03\/bigstock-Female-boss-about-to-kill-empl-113141414.jpg\" rel=\"attachment wp-att-1017\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-1017 size-large\" src=\"https:\/\/www.checkworks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/03\/bigstock-Female-boss-about-to-kill-empl-113141414-1024x683.jpg\" alt=\"Female boss about to kill the employee\" width=\"625\" height=\"417\" srcset=\"https:\/\/blog.checkworks.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/03\/bigstock-Female-boss-about-to-kill-empl-113141414-1024x683.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/blog.checkworks.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/03\/bigstock-Female-boss-about-to-kill-empl-113141414-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/blog.checkworks.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/03\/bigstock-Female-boss-about-to-kill-empl-113141414-768x512.jpg 768w, https:\/\/blog.checkworks.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/03\/bigstock-Female-boss-about-to-kill-empl-113141414-624x416.jpg 624w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 625px) 100vw, 625px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p><em>By: MJ Plaster<\/em><\/p>\n<p>The workplace is a melting pot of diverse backgrounds and eclectic personalities, so it\u2019s unreasonable to expect everyone will get along swimmingly all the time. Still, there is an expectation that employees will act civilly toward one another and ignore petty annoyances.<\/p>\n<p>Even minor irritations can send productivity plummeting, so how you handle toxic co-workers can make or break your day. Long term, how you manage these people can determine your career trajectory.<\/p>\n<p><!--more--><\/p>\n<p>Follow along as we take a virtual tour of an office with five extra-annoying co-workers, and discover how you can deal with them.<\/p>\n<p><strong>First, the Cardinal Rules<\/strong><br \/>\nThe workplace offers many rewards, and one of them is engaging with co-workers. As a general, these five steps can help encourage an esprit de corps:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Evaluate situations from the other person\u2019s perspective<\/li>\n<li>Attack behaviors, not people<\/li>\n<li>Avoid labels (such as the ones in this article)<\/li>\n<li>Disengage from testy situations when possible<\/li>\n<li>Report serious behavioral problems<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>1. The Know-It-All\/Control Freak<\/strong><br \/>\nThe Know-It-All knows everyone of any importance\u2014anywhere in the world\u2014is better at everything than you are, and is the oh-so-helpful, control-freak co-worker who is just dying to mold you into her very own \u201cmini me.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>No matter where you\u2019ve been or what you\u2019ve done, Know-It-All can one-up every experience you\u2019ve ever had in life. You spent the weekend in Aspen; she skied the Alps. Your manager invited you to lunch; she dined in the executive dining room with the president. You got rave reviews on your last project; she could have helped you do it faster, cheaper and better.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Antidotes:<\/strong> Inoculation in the form of preparation is your best protection when working on a project together. Make sure you\u2019re thoroughly prepared and that your work is immaculate. When she plays the one-up game, just smile with that \u201cknowing smile\u201d; you know the one\u2014the one that screams Bravo Sierra! When she offers helpful hints, smile, thank her for her input, and tell her you\u2019ll consider it.<\/p>\n<p>Psychology Today calls these types \u201cthe commanders\u201d and suggests that you diplomatically question their authority and ask them from where they derive their authority.<\/p>\n<p><strong>2. The Negative Nellie<\/strong><br \/>\nNothing is ever good enough for Negative Nellie, also known as the chronic complainer. It could be the weather\u2014it\u2019s too cold, too hot, too rainy or too sunny, or it could be a report that ran too long, short, used too many or too few illustrations. The gossiper is the first cousin of Negative Nellie. Have you ever heard \u201cgood\u201d gossip? Didn\u2019t think so.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Antidotes:<\/strong> If the complaint is something that doesn\u2019t matter, don\u2019t engage. Give a one-word answer and move along.<\/p>\n<p>Suppose, however, you\u2019re working on a project together, and Negative Nellie says there\u2019s no way he can do his part of the project\u2014it just can\u2019t be done.<a href=\"http:\/\/www.willbowen.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"> Will Bowen<\/a>, founder of Complaint-Free World, suggests saying something like this: \u201cIf it were possible to [do whatever], how would you make it happen?\u201d Negative Nellie is bound to come back with the same reply the first time or two. Keep at it until you can no longer stand it or until he comes to his senses.<\/p>\n<p>When Gossiper says something like, \u201cI can\u2019t stand it that Don comes to work late every day and never gets in trouble,\u201d try another showstopper courtesy of Will Bowen: \u201cYou know what I like about you? You\u2019re always so punctual. When you say you\u2019re going to be somewhere, you\u2019re always there at the appointed time.\u201d What can he possibly say to that except, \u201cThank you\u201d? I\u2019ve used this one, and it shuts down any further discussion.<\/p>\n<p><strong>3. The Office Bully<\/strong><br \/>\nEvery office has its Office Bully, and everyone despises the sight of this person. She\u2019s an equal-opportunity bully, and you never know when it\u2019s going to be your turn to bear the brunt of her wrath.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Antidote:<\/strong> Always stand your ground with the bully. The Bully shares this trait with a criminal: She\u2019ll always go after low-hanging fruit. Once you stand up to her, she\u2019s off to find another target\u2014someone who will cower in her presence.<\/p>\n<p><strong>4. The Keyboard Warrior<\/strong><br \/>\nKeyboard Warriors are perfectly rational when you encounter them in person. But turn them loose with a keyboard when they\u2019re tucked safely into their cubicles and they morph from the Lion in <em>The Wizard of Oz<\/em> to the lion in search of prey on the savanna.<\/p>\n<p>Keyboard Warrior is a coward at heart. If he were unemployed, he\u2019d spend his days in his parents\u2019 basement littering Disqus with comments. His email rants take two forms\u2014the work-related rants and the extra-curricular rants. Both are filled with serial exclamation points and emoji and elicit a sense of dread when they land in your inbox. Every email is a timewaster.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Antidotes:<\/strong> Put a stop to the extra-curricular rants. Stop them cold. Send a reply politely stating you don\u2019t have time for personal emails\u2014it\u2019s all you can do to handle work-related emails. Ask to be removed from his extra-curricular list. After that, ignore all personal emails and answer only the work-related ones with as much brevity as possible.<\/p>\n<p><strong>5. The Drama Queen<\/strong><br \/>\nThis type covers a great deal of territory. Drama Queens (who are just as likely to be male) can be Professional Victims, Social Justice Warriors (SJW) and The Crazy. These co-workers will suck the life out of you if you give them half a chance! They\u2019re needy, and while anyone with a speck of compassion might want to try to help them, they are bottomless pits.<\/p>\n<p>Classic Drama Queens are amusing and endearing\u2014they\u2019re the office Joan Rivers, and they make work fun. They\u2019re hazardous to your productivity because they offer hours of entertainment for anyone with a sense of humor and a keen appreciation of the absurd. They\u2019re the life of the party at work, and they\u2019ll use every ounce of encouragement as motivation to refine their routine and further embellish it.<\/p>\n<p>Professional Victim is Drama Queen absent the flair. Judith Orloff, M.D., author of Emotional Freedom, calls them \u201cemotional vampires.\u201d<br \/>\n<iframe loading=\"lazy\" width=\"625\" height=\"469\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/AxNXIo5oGxc?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p>Most people want to help their fellow human being, but some people do not want to be helped\u2014chief among them, Professional Victims. Their goal is to retain their status, not to shed it. To solve a problem would rob them of their victimhood. Even if it were possible to solve one problem, they come with a laundry list of problems, and life is too short.<\/p>\n<p>The Social Justice Warrior is sanctimonious. He\u2019s part Drama Queen, part Bully, and you\u2019ll never measure up to his standards. He operates from an indecipherable moral code with an equally obtuse dictionary of political correctness dictated by the group-think<em> du jour<\/em>. Life is a series of causes for the SJW, and if he comes after you when you fall on the wrong side of his cause, you are in for a world of misery. For example, heaven help you if you have children and he feels procreating is irresponsible.<\/p>\n<p>The Crazy belongs anywhere other than in the workplace and preferably behind locked doors. I have only run into one \u201ccertifiable\u201d workplace crazy, and I spent a miserable four days in her company.<\/p>\n<p>On one of my first trips as an international flight attendant, I checked in for my four-day trip from JFK to Geneva, and the rest of the crew was 20 years senior to me. They were nice enough except for the one with the very intense eyes. She might as well have spit on me when I walked into the briefing room. For some reason she took a visceral dislike to me\u2014probably due to my newbie status. On the way to Geneva, she worked the first-class cabin, and I was a world away from her in the back of the 707.<\/p>\n<p>When we boarded the crew bus in Geneva for our trip to the hotel, she sidled up to me and said, \u201cI\u2019m a witch, and I\u2019m going to make sure you die in a fire on the layover.\u201d I hadn\u2019t spoken 10 words to this woman, and I had no idea what had come over her. I was so spooked that I spent the entire two-day layover in my hotel room. When one of the other crewmembers asked me why she hadn\u2019t seen me on the layover, I relayed the story. She told me that \u201ceveryone\u201d knew The Crazy was insane, but I hadn\u2019t received the memo.<\/p>\n<p>On the trip home, The Crazy engineered it so that I would have to work the first class galley, thinking that I wouldn\u2019t be able to pull it off with a full load. I fooled her; I \u201cowned\u201d the first class galley from Day One of my career. Just as she was walking up to the cockpit, some grease splattered in the oven causing a bit of smoke in the galley. She stopped dead in her tracks to say, \u201cI told you I\u2019d set you on fire.\u201d How does a sane person respond to this?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Antidotes:<\/strong> Limit time with the Classic Drama Queen when you\u2019re busy. Spend all the time you want with her after hours and on breaks\u2014or when you need a good laugh.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.drbevsmallwood.com\/articles\/leadership\/troubled.html\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Bev Smallwood, Ph.D<\/a>., suggests that you identify what triggers mentally unstable co-workers so you can avoid whatever it is that sets them off. Monitor their behavior and discuss your concerns with your superior. It\u2019s better to be safe than sorry.<\/p>\n<p><strong>What\u2019s the Pattern?<\/strong><br \/>\nHave you spotted the pattern in these annoying co-workers? They all want attention. And what\u2019s the universal answer? Refuse to engage when possible. When you refuse to engage, you remove yourself as an eternal fount of sympathy and attention. When there\u2019s no payoff in annoying you, the extra-annoying co-worker will find someone who offers the desired payoff. As long as that\u2019s anyone but you, you win.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>By: MJ Plaster The workplace is a melting pot of diverse backgrounds and eclectic personalities, so it\u2019s unreasonable to expect everyone will get along swimmingly all the time. Still, there is an expectation that employees will act civilly toward one another and ignore petty annoyances. Even minor irritations can send productivity plummeting, so how you [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[81,31],"tags":[],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.checkworks.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1015"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.checkworks.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.checkworks.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.checkworks.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.checkworks.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1015"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/blog.checkworks.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1015\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1598,"href":"https:\/\/blog.checkworks.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1015\/revisions\/1598"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.checkworks.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1015"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.checkworks.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1015"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.checkworks.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1015"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}